CARY ANN ROSKO, LMFT

Working With Me

Deeply attuned online therapy for adults in California who are tired of figuring it out alone.

WORKING WITH ME

Your Patterns Developed for a Reason

I provide a space to work with the parts of you that have been trying to help, even when those efforts have begun to hold you back.

But what does that actually mean?

When confronted with a stressful, challenging, or dangerous situation, our bodies and minds reach for any strategy to deal with it. And if it works—if we survive that situation—we’ll unconsciously repeat that strategy again and again, even if it leads to more suffering. These are complex responses that show up in your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, and in your body and nervous system as well. As such, they require more than just insight or intellectual understanding to resolve. The work I do is focused on untangling these complex responses so you can process them on multiple levels and heal what’s lingering in your system.

In other words, we’ll look at the patterns and responses that may be causing problems now while getting curious about why they developed in the first place.

The work extends beyond intellectual understanding.

Understanding “why” is only part of the work.

The goal isn’t just to understand your patterns intellectually, but to notice and work with them as they’re actually unfolding. We’ll pay attention to what’s happening underneath the talking: the tension in your shoulders when a topic gets close, the impulse to pull away, or what your body seems to know before your mind has quite caught up.

I ask questions that go somewhere, I’ll point out when something doesn’t quite add up, and I’ll bring in a pattern from two sessions ago if that’s where I see the thread connecting. You can expect curiosity, room for humor, and gentle directness.

Our work has the best chance of being successful if you’re curious, self-reflective, open to experimenting with new things, and ready for change. You don’t have to know how to fix what’s troubling you (if you did, I’m sure you would have already!), but a willingness to engage in the process and commitment to growth are invaluable and will enhance our work together.

I take a holistic approach, which means I’m interested in all aspects of your wellness. I’m a neurodiversity-affirming therapist, so we can check and see if any particular neurodivergence is playing into what you’re experiencing and how our work can support your unique brain. I also know that context, cultural background, and relationship with systemic power all have tremendous bearing on your health, so we’ll look at those, too.

In our work together, I might draw from several different approaches, weaving them together based on what’s actually useful for you. These may include:

Internal Family Systems (IFS)
EMDR & the Flash Technique
Somatic Psychotherapy
Mindfulness
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
Neuroscience
Attachment Theory

Ways I Can Help

People rarely arrive with one tidy issue, and these areas tend to overlap. Still, much of my work falls into a few broad categories.

Anxiety & Trauma

You’ve probably developed some very effective ways of managing. The problem is they’re starting to cost more than they used to. We get underneath the patterns, not just around them.

High-achievers

You’re excellent at what you do. But somewhere along the way, what helped you succeed also became exhausting. The tools that got you here are not broken—they just were not built for this.

Neurodivergence

If you’ve spent your life being told you think too much, feel too much, or don’t quite fit the way others expect you to, you’re in the right place. Here, your unique way of being is welcomed.

Hi

I’m Cary.

And I’ve been a trusted listener my entire life.

01

Backstory

People have confided in me since I was young. Back then, I didn’t always know why other kids shared their troubles with me, but I did my best to listen and I could see that it made them feel better. Adults told me I should be a counselor, but I drew away from what at the time sounded like a big responsibility. Still, I was glad I could be there for others and I spent my earlier years organically and intuitively cultivating deep friendships.

02

Growth

I first came to therapy as a client in my late 20’s. I started reckoning with my codependency and complex trauma, and I learned how to face and feel what I couldn’t when I was younger. I started to work through the unconscious protections and strategies that had tangled me up internally and in my relationships. I began to feel more clear, more ease—more myself. When I was in my 30’s, I had a string of experiences and epiphanies that pointed me unambiguously toward becoming a therapist. So back to school and training I went, and it’s been a transformative ride.

03

Recently

Over the past several years, I’ve more fully recognized my neurodivergence as someone who is gifted and an HSP (Highly Sensitive Person). Giftedness is more than just an academic designation—it includes physiological and neurological differences that have unmistakably shaped my emotional, psychological, and social development from the beginning. Embracing these ways of being and my high sensitivity has freed me to relax, take care of myself, and enjoy life even more fully.

04

Beyond

I also balance my psychotherapy practice with my first career in theatre. I’m a classically-trained singer and hold two degrees in voice, and I perform opera, light opera, musical theatre, and plays on stages around the Bay Area. These two passions and disciplines share some key commonalities as both require deep empathy, embodied experience, and a willingness to be vulnerable. I’m also a big fan of learning, national parks, quality TV, and generally being a nerd.

The Practical Details

14

years in practice

50

minute sessions

$250

per session

License # MFC96606

Visa, MC, Discover, AmEx, and HSA/FSA accepted

LGBTQIA+ & Neurodiversity-Affirming

Specialized Training

Ready to find out if this is a fit?

A consultation isn’t a commitment; it’s a conversation. Twenty minutes is usually enough for both of us to get a sense of whether this could be a good match.